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Monday, July 9, 2012

HOW TO DEAL WITH SETBACKS

We’ve all hit that bump in the road, the setback, the problem. What sets people apart is how they react to that bump. Are you one to spin out of control, in despair? Or do you grab a hold of that wheel and steer yourself straight? Whether it’s a school assignment, a work project, or a volunteer mission, we all encounter things that slow us down.

Setbacks are inevitable; the trick is to know how to recover from them quickly. How do you get back into the good space again? How do you get back into the good space again? How do you deal with setbacks?

What not to do when trying to recover from setbacks:
Don't blame others. It might make you feel a little better in the short term, but long its damaging to relationships and doesn't solve the problem;
Don't blame yourself. It will just make you feel bad and damage your self esteem, and
Don't try to numb out. You know what I'm talking about. Eating chocolate, having a drink because "you've had an awful day", watching TV or surfing the internet. It distracts you but doesn't solve the problem.

FIVE STEPS TO RECOVER FROM SETBACKS
This simple 5 steps will help you to recover from setbacks:
1.  Give yourself some time to really what you feel.
    We get socialized to block out and numb our emotions. We pretend not to feel them so we don't give ourselves time to feel our disappointment, upset, anger or whatever the emotion is labeled. Take some time out and really allow yourself to feel what you feel it.

2.  Remember, all setbacks are there to help you learn and grow.
    As the emotions start to ease off, start to ask yourself some questions that will empower you, like: What could I do differently next time? How can I change this? What do I need to learn from this? How can I grow bigger than this problem? Everything that happens has its root cause somewhere in the past. It might be a thought a word or an action. Ask the right questions and you can move away from being "problem focused". Feel ok, no matter is going on.

3.  Develop a sense of trust that all is well.
    Nothing is ever lost - it just gets moved around - so you never really lose anything. It will come back to you. You will recover. Don't think about things in terms of "mistakes". Imagine that nothing is a mistake, that everything is unfolding perfectly. Ask yourself "What if this was the best thing that ever happen to me? What would a likely outcome have to be for that to be true? Even if that doesn't happen, just thinking it will make you feel better and get you to think in a positive way.

4.  Find the hidden opportunity; opportunity usually comes disguised as setback.
    Dig a bit deeper and find the hidden opportunity. If you do this you will be one of the rare people who do so - and those rare people end up being the successful ones.

5.  Consider doing some personal development work to improve your emotional resilience.
   Just like exercising to improve your body, you can improve your emotional and mental strength. For example coaching is specifically designed to move people forward in all ways.

In order to recover from setbacks, be objective. Step back and look at the
situation. Take responsibility where it is due, but don’t place blame on
others.

Above all, don’t live with regrets. Approach life with perseverance and
dedication to the things that matter most to you. Success is never easy. It
remains up to you whether you will give up, or fight through the tough
battles to earn whatever it is you want.

"You can do what you believe you can not do." - Les Brown

Have a great day.

With your success in mind,

Robert Malugu

Have a great day.

With your success in mind,

Robert Malugu


About the Author
Robert Malugu is the founder and editor of Malugu Robert - The Positive Thinking Site. Learn
more about him here and connect with him on Twitter, at Facebook, Google+, and LinkedIn.

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